[irrelig] Get your 75 million year-old body thetans and past life negative engrams purged, disconnect from any PTSs, prepare to perform auditing procedure R2-45 on any SPs, and read your KSWs, because this episode is all about Scientology. And out of fear of further chastising emails from Leighton’s brother Sean, we treated this particular belief system with exactly the respect it deserves.

Which is to say, none at all.

17 Responses to “53: Scientology”

  1. Just a quick note…. I think your paraphrasing H.L. Mencken. “Nobody ever went broke underestimating the intelligence of the American public.” PT Barnum said “There’s a sucker born every minute” Firesign Theater changed that to, “There’s a seeker born every minute.” No difference really.

  2. Angry Budgie says:

    Just when I thought Tom Cruise couldn’t be more of an annoying douche bag I was proven wrong. Being forced to listen to those clips of him with that infuriatingly obnoxious know-it-all tone of voice should be considered a form of torture. Do you force your Thai children to listen to these?

  3. Dietrich says:


  4. I would like to point out that Scientology funds the largest and most prestigious science fiction writing contest in the English-speaking world. Look up “L. Ron Hubbard’s Writers of the Future.”

    Their awards ceremonies are very Hollywood, and the hosts often include celebrities. They give $5,000 as the grand prize, no entry fee involved. They don’t even try to convert contest winners; they just make sure your photo is taken beneath a gigantic billboard-sized poster of L. Ron Hubbard in his later years.

    I didn’t know about his tax evasions or his gun clause, which might explain why he looks so pleased with himself in that poster, so thanks for enlightening me. I’ve lost some respect for the guy. But still, give him kudos for founding a religion devoted to science fiction writers!

  5. Jay Pea says:

    Apparently L. Ron couldn’t keep 75 Million and 75 Trillion straight, which is why he was talking about events that happened 74,986,500,000,000 years before the universe began. Or he had his head so far up his own ass that his head popped out his neck.

  6. Villiard says:

    Since I didn’t hear you mention it on the podcast, I will assume that you didn’t know about it, for it was too big a story about Scientology to be left out. Last year a French court convicted the Church of Scientology of fraud.


  7. Queen of Hearts says:

    Thanks for an entertaining podcast guys, and I am glad you guys went and got personality tests! When I lived in NYC, the Scientologists would set up tables in Times Square and inside of Union Square train Station with signs that said “Free Stress Tests” Who wouldn’t be stressed if you live in NYC, and you are being stared at by thousands of people walking by who are watching you hold two metal rods? What a joke.

    I wish the podcast was longer because I still don’t know who the Scientologists pray to. Are the Athiests? What is thier moral code? Do they have wierd dietary restrictions? I know they are homophobic, but I don’t know why.

    Keep up the good work 🙂

  8. Angry Budgie says:

    The Scientology diet…don’t ask how it’s linked to their childbirth practices.

    A great online resource about scientology is this website http://www.xenu.net/ . Possibly the most realistic comprehensive guide on the subject online with lots of interviews of former scientologists and plenty of links to related sites. Another great website is counterfeitdreams, which is one man’s story of his experiences and ultimately his story of abuse at the hands of scientology. http://counterfeitdreams.blogspot.com/

  9. Queen of Hearts says:

    Thanks, I had seen the South Park episode long ago, bu tafter seeing this interview, my interest was definitely piqued


  10. Travis Megee says:

    When I was going through Navy Nuclear Power School in Orlando, FL back in 1991 I had some dork sitting in Bennegins try to talk me and a buddy into Dyanetics. Dude sounded like he was on drugs the way he was talking about it. The bad thing was, he was a fellow Navy guy from another class. Guess he didn’t take to heart the first lesson of Navy Nuclear Power which is always ask ‘why’.

  11. These guys tried getting me to read Dianetics at ten. They used to set up at this flea market my family and I went to and one of the guys was trying to tell me how great it was and how I would be able to do anything.

    Then my Mom grabbed me and yanked me away and said “Don’t ever talk to them, they’re crazy” or something to that effect.

    Little did I know how right she was.

  12. I’ll buy both of you beers if I can get hooked up with a D.Ir (Doctor of Irreligiosophy)

  13. Angry Budgie says:

    For those of us who can’t afford the Doctorate Program is there a Master’s Program in Irreligiosophy?

  14. Foxy McLovin says:

    Finally! After doing a research paper on Scientology in college, there weren’t too many for me surprises in the “religious” content. You guys gave it your usual spin, however, and actually visiting one of their centers was a classic touch. Thanks! I’m sure there will be plenty of Engrams for Tom Cruise to deal with if he ever hears this!
    You mentioned the South Park episode: I hope you have seen the Mormon episode from Season 7.

  15. Rockhead says:

    Great episode. I have several family members who have been brainwashed into this cult. Everyone needs to contact their elected representatives and encourage them to have the IRS rescind their tax exempt status.
    Check out the NY Times article on March 7: http://www.nytimes.com/2010/03/07/us/07scientology.html?hpw=&pagewanted=all

  16. The ABC Four Corners covered this cult tonight:


    Reporter Quentin McDermott talks to men and women who were members of an elite unit inside the Church in Australia and the United States. They explain why they joined, how they worked tirelessly for Scientology, and how, in some cases, they were pressured, and pressured others, to hand over hundreds of thousands of dollars to the Church.

  17. Thought you might get a kick out of this…