{"id":683,"date":"2009-07-10T07:00:00","date_gmt":"2009-07-10T14:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.irreligiosophy.com\/?p=683"},"modified":"2009-07-10T07:44:28","modified_gmt":"2009-07-10T14:44:28","slug":"26-mormons-masturbation","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.irreligiosophy.com\/?p=683","title":{"rendered":"26: LDS Advice to Young Men"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>[chuck]So it looks like July will be another Mormon month for us here at Irreligiosophy. This week we discuss two articles given by Mormon leaders about the evils of masturbation and how to avoid hairy palms and blindness. Hilarity ensues when these old geezers strain their vocabulary trying to come up with polite euphemisms for choking the chicken, use metaphors like &#8220;little factories&#8221; to explain the function of testicles and why we have wet dreams, and even suggest wearing tight clothes to bed to avoid rubbing one out in a &#8220;semi-sleep condition.&#8221; Who even knew you could sin in a semi-sleep condition!<\/p>\n<p>We discuss the strangeness of a couple of doddering old men whose testosterone levels likely barely register giving advice to hormonally charged youth <a href=\"https:\/\/www.irreligiosophy.com\/podcasts\/ldsmast.m4a\"><b>right here<\/b><\/a>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>[chuck]So it looks like July will be another Mormon month for us here at Irreligiosophy. This week we discuss two articles given by Mormon leaders about the evils of masturbation and how to avoid hairy palms and blindness. Hilarity ensues when these old geezers strain their vocabulary trying to come up with polite euphemisms for [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6,13],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-683","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-mormonism","category-podcasts"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.irreligiosophy.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/683","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.irreligiosophy.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.irreligiosophy.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.irreligiosophy.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.irreligiosophy.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=683"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.irreligiosophy.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/683\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":688,"href":"https:\/\/www.irreligiosophy.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/683\/revisions\/688"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.irreligiosophy.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=683"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.irreligiosophy.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=683"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.irreligiosophy.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=683"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}