[irrelig]Since the Old Testament is filled with horrifically immoral behavior on the part of the omnibenevolent Creator of the Universe, Leighton and I crack open our New Testaments to see if our Lord and Savior has mellowed with age. Is Jesus the loving, pacifistic, meek and mild-mannered protector of family values that we always hear about? Unsurprisingly, it seems that Christians have once again confused Jesus with Superman, because even according to the Bible, Jesus is kind of a dick.

Also, this one’s for you, Google:

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[ann] Wherein we discuss recent news items including God smiting a devout Catholic with a stone altar, a Mormon man disciplined for speaking out against his leaders’ support for Proposition 8, and two Florida high school educators charged with contempt of court for violating a court order not to pray at school events.

All of that, plus Leighton inexplicably advises all of you not to download our podcasts, right here.

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[chuck]The commercial we were spoofing in the Job podcast is the NOM spot against gay marriage, filled with such WTF moments as “I will have no choice” (err … what?), “my freedom will be taken away” (your freedom to discriminate?), and “rainbow coalition” (right, because it can’t be discrimination if people of enough colors are doing it). It is so bad, it’s almost as if these guys were secretly parodying themselves.

For comparison purposes, here is our commercial:

[irrelig]In this episode, we discuss the Book of Job, in which we discover that God has a serious gambling problem. Satan wagers God that he can make Job, an upright and blameless man who eschews evil, curse God to his face if only he allows Satan to kill all Job’s children, take away all of his possessions, and cover him from head to toe with boils. God’s response? “I’ll take that bet!”

Listen to our takedown in this episode, which also features listener feedback and another sponsor’s commercial.

[ann]Catholicism is the gift that keeps on giving. Recently a little booklet was published entitled, “Prayer Book for Spouses,” that encourages couples to pray before intercourse, in an apparent attempt to suck out any pleasure the couple might be contemplating having together. This is Catholic birth control at its finest.

In contrast, we offer the Irreligiosophy pre-coital prayer, helpfully broken down into male and female versions. As an added bonus to those of you who actually visit our website, we provide the following prayer for the single male, prior to masturbating:

Dear Lord of Hosts, King of Kings, Most Gracious, Ever-Present Universal Peeping Tom,

And when it be finished, please, bless my rectal rooter that it be ready when called forth for future battle. Amen.

Give a listen right here.